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Let me start by defining what self-worth is when you value yourself. It is a belief that you are a good person who deserves good things. The Webster Dictionary defines self-worth as a sense of one’s own value as a human being. Everyday I am seeing more and more people losing sight of what their self-worth is. They are blurring the lines of self-worth with a popularity contest.

You can’t define your self-worth with how many likes or follows you are getting on social media. Most of those people on social media don’t even know you. All they know is what you post. You can’t find self-worth in what other people think or say. So, do yourself a favor and stop looking for validation from other people and start looking for it from the person looking back at you in the mirror.

A girl staring in the mirror.

How To Know Your Self Worth

You have to ask yourself some hard questions to know what your self-worth is. Ask yourself these questions and answer them honestly.

  • What can you do that no one else does?
  • What qualities make your feel special or unique?
  • How do you feel about yourself?
  • What are my positive qualities?
  • What do you see when you look in the mirror?

See how all of the questions revolve around you and how you feel. The reason is because what other people think of you doesn’t matter. They don’t define your self-worth only one person can do that and that person is you. If you answered the questions with negative thoughts and feeling towards yourself you can change them. That is a decision you have to make right here and now. Make the decision that you are more and are worthy of happiness. Because at the end of the day all everyone really wants is to be happy.

I promise you if you are seeking your self-wroth in external factors you are not going to find it. Self-worth is something that needs to come from within. This is about your mindset and that we are all capable of being amazing individuals. When you know your self-worth the possibilities are endless.

How to recognize your self-worth

A woman sitting at a desk, in front of a laptop. With a phone in her hand checking social media

Reduce the external noise

You need to get quiet and listen to yourself not others. Stop listening to what other people say about you and worry about what you are saying about yourself. You control how you feel and letting all the external noise like social media control how you feel will only lead you to feeling unworthy. You need to reach a point where what other people say doesn’t matter to you.

Set small goals

Set small goals because when you set small achievable goals for yourself you will actually do them. Setting huge goals and unrealistic timelines all you do is set yourself up for failure and in turn that makes you feel unworthy. You can have an ultimate goal, but set yourself up with small goals in order to reach your ultimate goal.

For example, you want to get back in shape. Most of us set this goal and then go full force thinking that its going to happen instantly. So we go on this crazy diet that in a few weeks we are kicking to the curb.  The better way to do this is to take small steps so instead of working out everyday set a goal to workout 2-3 times a week for 30 minutes. When you do see yourself doing it consistently you feel accomplished and your self-worth increases.

Failure is a part of learning

Learn to accept that you are going to fail. Our self-worth also revolves around what we know. We all have our weaknesses, but it is what you do with those weaknesses that matter. If you don’t fail you will never learn. If you never learn you will never grow. Growing as a person increases your self-worth in the long run. Accept the mistakes you have made, forgive yourself, and move on.  

Small post-it notes with a happy face on the left and a sad face on the right. Sitting on a sea saw made out of popsicle sticks. With a post-t note in the middle saying "I AM"

Treat yourself with kindness

We are constantly talking negative about ourselves. Most of the time we are do it without even realizing we are doing it. For example I found myself saying that “I started this little blog on the side” and I don’t really talk about it with a lot of my friends. Meanwhile I work on this blog everyday because I love it and it makes me happy knowing that I am out here helping other working mama’s. You would think that I would be shouting it from the roof tops, but instead I keep it to myself. That is something I am going to have to work on.

Whatever you do it is not small or insignificant not if it is something you truly care about. When it comes to saying negative things about our appearance can severely damage your self-worth. You need to know that you are beautiful just the way you are. We come all different shapes and sizes, but we have the option to change it. Find something that you do like about yourself and work on the things that you want to improve. So be kind to yourself and love yourself because you have so many amazing qualities that the world has yet to see.

Final Thoughts

We live in a society where we let others determine our self-worth when really only one person can do that and that person is you. It may not be easy to recognize your self-worth, but you are worthy. Take inventory of all the great things that make you, you and know that you are enough.

I believe that self care plays a big part in your self-worth so be sure to check out Why Self Care Is Important.

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